A Poetic Roast of Celtic...with a side of blog

Jared Wickerham

The Celtic season's nearly over, to most its cause for cheer
Many nights of losses had us crying in our beer
Fans and celtic bloggers, though as loyal as can be
know the thing to ease the pain must be the lottery.

"How could he" cried the loyalists when THE TRADE went down last summer
Ainge was cast as villian, dunce... Could anyone be dumber?
but he had seen the signs that showed the future to be scary
we loved KG, and miss PP, ( but no one's missing Terry).

A brute was needed now, we said, and Sully volunteered
His back was fine, but at 6'9, no centers ever feared
His rebounds came in bunches and his toughness guaranteed
but he left the paint, to where centers aint, and started chucking 3s.

Kelly O was drafted first by Ainge and some were in despair
He was slow, his arms were short, he never got much air
But now he gets some love for both his talent and his flare
But he would be much faster if he cut his freaking hair.

Bass has had the challenge of us always talking trade
He began the year by missing shots he almost always made
I'll admit that he can play, though most already know
its best to dodge the bullets of Ed schultz and master Po.

To save some cash, DA was brash, ... Dumped crawford, Brooks and Lee
Celts got bayless, more cap space, and a corpse named Anthony
Then Fav was injured much too soon, a hinderance to his fame
El Hombre Indestructible might need a new nickname.

Hump got here from Brooklyn, and he came as no one's friend
The sacrifice that one must make as an ex- Kardashian
we were quick to like him once we saw what was in store
but he might be just another big whose feet dont leave the floor.

Bradley, if he's healthy, makes defensive coaches dream
but I dont like his passes going straight to other teams
it could just be some bad luck that he's always in great pain
The kid just needs a break...but will more likely get a sprain.

Green is inconsistent, and that seems to be our take
one night we check if he's on fire...the next if he's awake
And Pressey is a quick one, just watch him shake and bake
but give him jumpshots from the dock and he might just miss the lake.

Then there's Rajon Rondo, the cause for much debate
bloggers fight like cats and dogs deciding if he's great
No matter what the argument, it could be this or that
We'll provide the lying eyes while mmmmm will have the stat.

Here's to summer trades and drafts, I hope we are successful
free agents, vets, and college kids... Its all been mighty stressful
Now Danny waits with patience for that desperate team to call us
The one we give a round 2 pick...And they get Gerald Wallace.

So next year's Celts, we all hope, will start to make some noise
Please let Jeff and Kevin write 'bout men instead of boys
A better bunch of bloggers I have never ever seen
None agree on everything, but everyone bleeds GREEN!

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