clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Gilbert Arenas Vendetta

I'm sitting here watching Spurs/Blazers, thinking about riveting Celtics news like Scot Pollard practicing and realizing that I'm bored. I want Celtics/Wizards tomorrow at the latest. Instead I have to wait until Friday. Friday?! And to top if off the Timberwolves don't open until Friday either. So I can't pass the time watching Al Jefferson develop. As a result I have decided to open a one-man campaign against Gilbert Arenas. Why? Three reasons.

  1. As much as I love his blog I hate the fact that unlike 99.9% of blogs it does not allow users to click on individual posts. That makes linking to him a huge problem. Granted that is not Agent 0's fault. But I'm blaming him because otherwise this would be a pretty lousy campaign against him.
  2. In his post "The Real Big Three" Arenas took a veiled shot at the Celtics triumvirate:
"Our Big Three is just trying to get back in sync with each other because we haven't played together since April 2. We're just trying to get our mojo back and get our confidence back so when we start off this season we can compete with that other Big Three that's out there trying to take our crown away from us. Caron is healthy. He just had a hand injury, that's easy to come back from."

     1. Gilbert's prediction, also from his blog:

"Oh man, everybody is jumping on this Celtics band wagon. You know what? I was going to go prediction-free for the whole year, but I guess I'm going to break that now.

Now, if anybody remembers back when I got drafted, I got a report back that the reason I dropped so far in the draft was that Jim O'Brien of the Celtics said that I was too immature and that I wasn't ready for the NBA. What really happened was that I had an Achilles injury and I went back to L.A. to go get it healed when I was supposed to have a two-day workout in Boston with O'Brien. He didn't like that. So word came back to me that he was trashing me and it put this knife through my chest about the Boston Celtics.

Back in the day when I would daydream I thought that if I could score 100 points against any team it would be the Boston Celtics. Now, I knew it would never happen, but if I could do one thing in the NBA it would be to score 100 against Boston. So anyway, since everybody is back on the Boston bandwagon it brought back old memories. So listen here. On November 2nd, we're going to go into that building, we're opening up Boston. Right now I'm telling the Boston fans: You guys are going to lose. It's not going to be a victory for Boston. You might as well just cheer for me, because Boston isn't winning in Boston for the season opener. I'm sorry."

So over the next few days I will take shots at Arenas in the hopes of drawing him into a blog war. Granted Gilbert Arenas has much better things to do than give me my 15 minutes of fame. However, anyone who has ever read his blog has to agree that he is the most likely NBA player to fire back at a critic. On top of that it feels a lot safer than going at someone like Zach Randolph and his "Hoops Family" posse. But back to Arenas. Enjoy the first of many Arenas centered jokes. The following is an exchange I expect to have with Agent 0 some day.

"Hey Gilbert, you're the sixth best point guard!" - Me to Arenas in a mocking fashion.
"In the NBA?" - Arenas, incredulously.
"To ever come out of Arizona! Bibby, Terry, Stoudamire, Kerr, Kenny Lofton and then you!" - Me throwing down the gauntlet.

And yes I got that idea from Evander Holyfield's classic SporstCenter commercial, which I have posted below.