I am going to write this from my personal perspective but I know many of you will relate on a certain level. Forgive me if it rambles, I'm doing this for mostly selfish, therapeutic reasons.
I can't even explain to you how frustrated I am right now. I'm not going to punch a wall or anything, in fact that's part of the problem. I don't think I could muster up enough energy to get that mad. I wish I was mad enough to really start ranting because then I'd at least start really writing again. But I feel like I've been coated with tree sap and my feet are planted in mud up to my ankles.
This lockout has stolen more than basketball from me. It has stolen my creativity, my zeal, my passion, and most of all my creative outlet.
If I have to update the site with another rumor about a player "considering overseas options" I'm going to just start typing gibberish and see if anyone notices. At least we had the draft way back at the beginning of this but there's been no real basketball news worth discussing since then. In any offseason there are times when there's not much going on, but at least there's the hope that something could happen. At least you know that in October the ball will go up and games will start. This year, not so much.
It doesn't help that I'm in the pessimistic camp. I don't really see and end to this tunnel. I imagine there's some chance that this could all get resolved in a few months, or maybe a few months after that, but at that point why not a few more months and then the whole year?
I had so many good ideas way back in June and July. At least I thought I did until I sat down to write them. They either sounded too lame to me or I just put them off till later and never got around to them. Toss in a little procrastination and a normal hectic summer schedule and you have a good recipe for blaaaaahh.
Forgive the stream of consciousness. I know I'm not the best writer around but I still consider myself a "writer" so this was in part an effort to just ...start ...writing. Write anything. Take that first step. It is like when you stand in the edge of the surf and the waves bury your feet in the mud and you just feel stuck. That first step out of the mud is hard, but once you get past it, you can move again.
Feel free to keep me honest. Yell at me. Challenge me. Shoot, get mad at me if you want, it would be better than apathy. Make me write again. Not that any of this is up to you. If you are reading this, well, I'm already in your debt like you'd never know. Thank you, thank you, for sticking around. I'll do what I can to honor that loyalty with my efforts. Cheers.