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Midsummer Night's Mailbag Answers

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"Lord, what fools these mortals be!" - Puck

Mark J. Rebilas-USA TODAY Sports

In which I try to answer your oddest questions.

mikedmccullough

- how many hustle injuries (i.e. summer league fingers) will Marcus Smart endure before seasons end?
- How many times will you blog about Kelly Olynyk's hair this season? over/under 10?
- How many times this season will we get our hopes up about James Young and Perry Jones III just to be let down?

42

p0l@rbot58

Which Boston Celtic do you think would fit the protagonist role best within the context of a Kurosawa-style samurai film? However, instead of using samurai swords and martial arts, the movie would showcase great basketball skill (TIGER STYLE). Given your selection, how would the first scene go?"

Based on skills alone I would have gone with Isaiah Thomas, but he's more of a Jackie Chan kind of guy.  I thought of Marcus Smart, but he seems a bit more Bruce Lee.  Jae Crowder is the guy that I think has the right samurai attitude.  "Civilize the mind but make savage the body."

Eric M Van

Would Brad Stevens ever deflate a ball to gain an advantage over another team? Should he? Has he?

Absolutely not. Brad Stevens would never, ever, ever deflate a ball.  He would watch hours and hours of game tape, run statistical analysis, and come up with a plan to maximize the ball's talents.  In a sense, he would actually INflate the ball.

Don_manen

Chances of U.S. trading for Durant?

The U.S. National team doesn't have to trade for Kevin Durant.  If he's healthy enough to play and wants to take part in the games, I'm sure they'd love to have him.  ((See what I did there?)

JamaisLeDimanche

Remember Leon Powe?

Kobe does.

RobertoDuvales

What kind of furniture would Larry Bird be if Magic was a garlic press, from Target?

Well, Magic could beat any press by hitting his targets in the open court.  Larry Bird made everyone around him better and had a leg up on any opponent, so clearly he's an ottoman from Bob's.

Soooooo

Why?

34

EnviroCaper

If an Olynk falls in the deep woods of the great north, does he make a sound???

Yes, it would sound a bit like this.

Marios

2016 free agency... I am bored with the playoff hunt.. Set a meeting.. Russell cousy mchale bird everyone.. at the center of the garden. And LeBron and Kevin... Both...

Someone take this guy's keys before he gets on the road.

EnviroCaper

"Who's on first?"  If you had to take our current roster and play the Red Sox in baseball.... what 9 players would you take and what postions would you have them play.

Batting order:

1. Isaiah Thomas - CF
2. Avery Bradley - 2B
3. Marcus Smart - SS
4. Jared Sullinger - 1B
5. Jae Crowder - 3B
6. David Lee - DH
7. Tyler Zeller - RF
8. Amir Johnson - C
9. Jonas Jerebko - LF
P. Kelly Olynyk
UIF Evan Turner

I may have thought way too long and hard about that last question - I need a nap.

I'll try to get around to some of the more serious questions shortly.