Answering your questions about the universe, layups, and sandwiches with Kevin Garnett

My goodness, you people have a lot of questions. Perhaps I should be careful what I ask for in the future. That’s great, but I’m going to have to split this up a little. Here are some of my favorite off-beat questions and some answers I came up with. Results may vary.

Blue Steel: Sixers offer Ben Simmons for Jayson Tatum. Should Ainge accept the offer?

No, he should do what he always does. Lowball an offer in return, delay, hold out for a better deal, leak the talks to the media, and then brag about how close he came to making a deal.

David Anthopoulos: True, or False: We will hang Banner 18 this year. Don’t mean to put you on the spot, but if you loved taking tests in school and miss them, then you should love the good old “true or false” question.

This is easy, FALSE. (However, if they do win the Championship this year, they will raise the banner at the beginning of next season. See what I did there?)

VegasCeltic: Why is there something instead of nothing?
Follow up, how does this affect the Celtics?

Because something is nothing without something to fill the nothingness around the something we put in our hearts to hide from the nothingness.

Divide by zero.

Nathan Lopez: How was the density and mass of the universe found?

Wait, are you calling me dense and massive? I’ve been trying to watch what I eat.

ItsNotLuck: You made a mistake mentioning the universe

So, let’s talk SpaceX and Elon Musk. Clearly the BFR should be in operation by the end of the next year, likely just as preliminary testing, but it will be Mars ready by eh, 2021. Do you believe the interplanetary colonization will be a success or failure? Why or why not? Answer in RACE format, (Restate question, Add detail, Cite sources, Examples provided) 4-5 sentences.

EXTRA CREDIT: Will there be basketball on Mars? Will it be Martian gravity? Will there be an NBA? Will the NBA teams be the same or different? Will intergalactic NBA franchises form? Will Kyrie still insist on a flat Earth after seeing the view from Mars?

I bent my Wookie.

terd ferguson’s hat: What’s the best sandwich?

Hot dogs topped with spaghetti. Because chaos.

Mike Maddux: Layups over valued?

Do advanced analytics, or nba coaches, take into account what happens AFTER a missed shot when trying to place a value on a type of shot? For example, it seems to me that missed layups often lead to fast breaks with numbers for the opposing team, with one of your guards collapsed on the floor at the wrong end of the court. Three pointers, on the other hand, seem to lead to more offensive rebounds, and, in the case of a defensive rebound, your guards are already in good defensive position. I don’t have any stats to back this up, just wondering.

Interesting theory. I don’t have stats either, but I’d imagine that the higher percentage of success rate at scoring on layups offsets any impact of the player ending up on the floor in transition. Also, aggressive rebounders would probably swing things in either direction.

Oh, that was way too serious an answer. So I’m changing my answer to “More Antoine Walker 3’s! (Because there are no fours.)”

The Next Banner: Why?

Chaos.

coffee_beans: You wake up in the middle of the night hungry and go to the kitchen, to suddenly find Kevin Garnett raiding your fridge. He looks at you and freezes, a half-finished sandwich in his mouth. KG’s eyes say that he’s waiting for you to make a move, and you don’t know if he’ll attack, stay put, or retreat. What do you do?

Me: “...so, ...do you like olives?”

Great creative questions folks. I’ll try to address some of the more serious ones on my next post and/or Facbook Live video.